Let The People Advise
by Pinky Meadow
Anyone can be an advice columnist. Nerve's popular Sex Advice From... feature proves how willing people are to give advice, whatever their walk of life. And no wonder...we have an outsider perspective that the other person seeks. This is the idea behind confessions, therapy and a myriad of other social services.
How willing would people be to offer advice on the internet, besides "Go blow yourself?" I, Pinky, decided to investigate by asking for advice from IRC chatrooms &mdash an idea that first came from the Onion, from a bygone day of HTML coding. The response was more surprising than you'd think.
On to the first question.
Dear Pinky,
Every few months my uncle and his wife come to my house and won't leave for a few weeks at a time. It drives me crazy! How can I get rid of them without causing undue stress?
Sincerely,
Vexed in Victoria
Well, that seems like a fairly straightforward question. How about we start off somewhere that could provide us with clear, prescient knowledge. The voice we need here is a rational but wisened one, especially one of someone who has lived and seen things nobody else has seen. We need a voice, I think, of the future.
Vassago: Welcome to the internet's Witches chat room. Please respect the room's very basic rule: no harsh language or disrespect to others, Thanks, and Merry Meet. You are among Witches.
Diane: Be welcome VexedInVictoria... and enjoy at your stay if wizardry is what you search for, type ^wizardess help and Junia will surely help.
VexedInVictoria: Hello Diane, thank you for your kind welcome.
VexedInVictoria: I have a question actually.
Bronzeidol: which Victoria u in VexedInVictoria?
VexedInVictoria: The one in Canada.
Bronzeidol: I was born there
lil306: mm
Serena:mm
VexedInVictoria: Well, yes, it's a nice place. My question is this: Every few months my uncle and his wife come to my house and won't leave for a few weeks at a time. It drives me crazy! How can I get rid of them without causing undue stress?
VexedInVictoria: Any help would be much appreciated.
lil306: yeah last time my freind and i were out guy started to flirt with me he drained the guy so bad the guy pasted out on me
Bronzeidol: noone here will understand locations here but me...I been all over this province
I haven't. Hopefully I won't embarrass myself.
Serena: I can't think of a nice way to get them out....its not like you can cleanse them out..lol..
lil306:yeah
Serena: I would stop feeding them..or charge rent...but I am a mean wicca..lol
VexedInVictoria: Well, they live in Quebec.
lil306: i just didnt like how the guy past out on me i had to go change shirt the guy spilt drink on me
Bronzeidol: omigod VexedInVictoria
Bronzeidol: how can they come all this way?
Oh...um. Well, I'll have to figure that out.
VexedInVictoria: I'm from Quebecois. There is a good reason I left, if you know what I mean.
Bronzeidol: yae, I do
There's always plenty of reason to leave where you've come from.
Bronzeidol: well ... if I know the situation right
Bronzeidol: I tell .. u ..
VexedInVictoria: if I point out to them the absurdity of this, they glower at me.
Bronzeidol: is a long way 2 come
lil306: sounds like moochers
Bronzeidol: u must respect that
VexedInVictoria: Respect that they don't pay rent when they stay here for three weeks?
lil306: yeah
Bronzeidol: dun' matter that VexedInVictoria
Bronzeidol: k
Bronzeidol: is more to this than that
VexedInVictoria: Well, I like to walk around my house naked sometimes--something I can't really do when I have unwanted guests.
VexedInVictoria: Unlike "vampires," you can't uninvite them.
starmaiden: unwanted guests? ive got one of those right now! bloody moocher too!
VexedInVictoria: Is that so, starmaiden?
starmaiden: yea he just wont leave
starmaiden: or pay rent
starmaiden: im gonna throw his clothes out and lock the door if he doesent leave b4 the baby gets here!
VexedInVictoria: the baby?
starmaiden: yeah im expecting
Serena: I think sometimes people think everything is thiers and that is not the case
VesedInVictoriaSo...what should I tell them next time they come over?
_onyx_: lkeep a suit case by door everytime the come grab it and head to the car saying sorry i am on vacation or going on a short trip let the sit outside they will leave
Serena: Tell them to stay in a hotel!
BetaWizard: hmm, is it possible for you to take the problem to them vic?
VexedInVictoria: How do you mean, Beta?
BetaWizard: ie, you spend a few weeks in THEIR home
VexedInVictoria: Hmmm.
BetaWizard: see how they react
VexedInVictoria: that's not a bad idea, Beta.
VexedInVictoria: I like how you think.
Hm...not bad.
Jump to Page: 1 2 3Text © Pinky Meadow 2006. Names have not been changed to protect the anonymous; they need no protection.